Other People's Money

No, I'm not talking about the 1991 Danny DeVito film.

I'm talking about my new found motivation for losing weight.  Yeah, okay, there's all of the normal motivations like living healthier, looking better naked, and an increased likelihood that I can talk someone into seeing how much better I look naked.

However, it appears that I'm the kind of girl who needs a competition with a prize.  A cash prize.  And, it's even better when that cash prize is - you guessed it - other people's money.

People at my company have had their own version of The Biggest Looser for the past few years.  There's been a group of about ten folks who have participated every year.  A mass e-mail went out this morning announcing the start of a new round that kicks off today and runs through July. 

There's a $10 buy in and a weekly fee of $1 for each week that a person gains or maintains their weight.  The winners are based on the percentage of weight lost.*  Second place gets $10 and first places gets everything else.

When I signed up this morning around 10 a.m. there was a $150 pot.

The way I figure it is that I already have plans to go shopping at the outlets^ in mid-June, so if I lose even a little weight this little competition is going to better justify all of my shopping.~


*If Person A weights 110 pounds and loses 5 pounds during the competition - they would have lost 4.5 percent - and Person B weighs 200 pounds and loses 8 pounds - losing 4 percent of their body weight.  Person A would win.

^Women love outlets.  I have a uterus, therefore I also love the outlets.

~Bonus.

Dear Acuvue Oasys Rebates - I hate your stinking guts

It's true.  You are nitpicky, ridiculous in your rules, and pretty damn lame.

After three back-and-forths, with me providing more and more information, you have still rejected my rebate.  I know it's only $25, but considering I've already invested about $5 of postage into this little information gathering mission of yours - I really feel like I've earned it.

Listen, I get it.  You require that a person buys contacts within 90 days of a vision exam, and you give them six months to buy one year's worth of contact lenses.  Well, I did all of that.  But, my second round of contacts was ordered during the first week of a new year. 

BAM!  I'm disqualified.

You know what, Acuvue?  You can suck it. 

I know that I'm only one person shelling out a couple hundred dollars per year for fancy contacts, because I have astigmatisms in both eyes.  But, I also know that there's a nice little assortment of other contact manufactures who would love to get their hands on both my eyes and my money. 

Plus, after looking into the likes of Biofinity Torics, which sound pretty awesome, and Air Optix for Astigmatism, which don't sound shabby either, my peepers are pretty pumped to try something else on for a change.

Don't look for any future rebates from me, because there won't be any.  I mean, even if these other contact companies don't have a rebate program - since I'll be saving $5 in postage every time I try to apply for a rebate, it's almost as good as a rebate.  Actually, it's even better - there's NOTHING for me to fill out, make copies of, or contact my doctor for further elaboration on.  I'm not even required to sign up for annoying e-mail reminders, which I then have to unsubscribe from.

Do nothing and save money?  It's like magic!

And with this, Acuvue Oasys, I bid you adieu.