5. You start you day before dawn.
4. The friends you make at the gym are more likely to be retirees than hot bodies.
3. Sure, it’s 7:30 p.m. on a Saturday that also happens to be your 30th birthday and you’d rather go home and watch Veronica Mars, but when it comes right down to it – you’re indifferent about staying out late at a bar.
2. The $100 you received as a birthday gift is spent on: copayments for doctors’ visits, a case of cat food, and you “splurge” on day old bagels and schmears.
1. You remember when your hometown used to be smaller/different/before it had a gas station.
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